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Cake day: June 16th, 2023

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  • For some reason, monogamy was the default in Europe, and that default goes back thousands of years. There were times when men could have second or more partners, but they were never on the same level as wife and any children born from these unions weren’t entitled to inherit anything from the father. It is just a cultural signifier that goes back before Christianity; Romans were monogamous.

    To add to this, Western peoples have slowly redefined marriage over the past century to go from a man and his wife to the union of two people. This has given women more power in marriage while also allowing for same gender marriages, since gender is no longer a defining characteristic of marriage in a Western society. I would see same gender marriages being harder in a polygamous society as gender is hard coded into the rules.

    As for the Western aversion to polygamy, you’ve seen a lot of people here describe polygamy as “less civilized”. That belief has been around for centuries, so it isn’t tied to marriage equality For instance, the statehood of Utah was delayed until the Mormon church gave up polygamy.
















  • There are two ways to look at it.

    1. You’re in shock and you haven’t started processing it yet. It is common for people to have delayed reactions to traumatic news.

    2. Not all intimate relationships need to be monogamous and it sounds like you may be ok with that. It isn’t the typical reaction to infidelity, but it isn’t unheard of.