Well… I find it kinda funny (and I find it kinda sad) that the dreams in which I’m dying are the best I’ve ever had.

Because our parents fucked.

It would explain why he’s such a fungi.

There’s little I buy regularly that would have intrusive tech put in it. I hope they don’t start making SmartBread. Go to make a sandwich but I have to wait for a security update so my sourdough can’t be hacked (except it opens up 3 more security holes that weren’t present before the update and now a Russian hacker is using my bread to make a jellied meat sandwich remotely).

That’s why when doing high dives and such where you jump into water from a great height, you need to cross your legs and clench your asshole; if you hit the water wrong without doing so, you’ll shoot water up your pooper and out your mouth. 😌

Arnold Schwarzenegger. When he was running for govenor, he had a rally nearby a doctors office I just happened to have an appointment at near the same time and I was able to get in line to shake hands and get the autograph. I’m not sure if I still have the autograph book he signed tho. My mom had it stored with a bunch of my old kid stuff growing up and I don’t think it was brought with us when we moved and I can’t ask her now since she’s no longer with us. Gotta go through all the stuff still packed up in the closets.

I also got Mitch Hedberg’s autograph. It’s just not the Mitch Hedberg you might have imagined upon reading that. But he is/was also a comedian. Saw him and a couple other small time comedians at a local club. His name was a large part of his set.

Mine never even had one.

I mean… If you’re gay for getting stabbed it might be nice. 🤷‍♂️

Maybe… Depends on how you believe in ghosts. Some beliefs say wood can hold the spirits, so if that’s what you think I imagine replacing the ghost filled wood would remove the ghosts.

If you don’t believe in ghosts at all, well, then this is kind of a weird thing to ask. 🤷‍♂️

The nearest one to my apartment is called The Brass Tap. And it’s one of those bars that is more like a coffee shop than a bar; well lit, sterilized, corporate shit.

We also have a gay bar in town called The Brave Bull which is apt, because you gotta be brave to go there considering it has a reputation as being a place you will likely be stabbed at.

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I assumed you were actually meaning the church hymn and not the Leonard Cohen song and was just being silly. 🤣

🎵Well I heard there was a secret chord,

That David played and it pleased the Lord,

But you don’t really care for music, do ya?🎵

Kinda weird to play a love song for that… 🤷‍♂️

Hold up… How does paying LESS TAXES mean they have LESS money for raises? Sounds more like the company needs to be sued, not the state.

Tim Curry.

It’s cheap and easy as fuck to start a consulting business. Whether or not you’ll be successful with it is an entirely different question. Especially if you’re honest about not knowing fuck about shit. :p

I mean, it all technically is behind a paywall if you count internet access. I’d just go to bars and clubs to chat if every website each had their own subscriptions on top of that, tho. Not sure how I’d get memes tho. 🤔

It depends on the plan you get. Either you get pre-paid minutes (which can be bought with cash, which is another reason they are commonly used by drug dealers) or you pay month-to-month.

The shitty burner phones they sell at Walmart or Dollar General, often called “drug phones” are pay by the minute, no contract needed things.

Mods, this guy just told me to kill myself! /s