Live music performances often fill that void for me. It doesn’t have to be a fancy orchestra or expensive venue, my town hosts free live music once a week. The music is nice because it gives you the opportunity to zone out and be introspective while surrounded by others. There is also usually a social scene before and after the set.

I didn’t reflect on all of this until my 20’s. I coach girls from around 8-18 years old, and the standards for interacting with kids nowadays means you have to take a lot of abuse training courses. That coupled with watching the girls I coach try to navigate social media and coming of age made me realise how abnormal my own upbringing was.

Its crazy how protective I feel about these kids that aren’t even my own. But looking back on the dangers lurking in the corners, I know how important it is to keep kids in the loop. Not to scare them, or try to keep them isolated. But safety starts with communicating freely with the safe adults in your life. I think things are trending towards more quality information about sex being readily available. Most (non religious) parents seem to realize they need to raise confident kids that they have an open dialogue about important things with.

My mom peaked in my room and left me with the American Girl book about hygiene and female anatomy. I don’t think it said anything about sex. Just had to navigate that part of life armed with (mis)information from whispered conversations with friends over sleepovers.

I think back on how many experiences I had growing up that could have gone wrong. This was all happening just as AIM chatrooms and chat roullette were popular. And there were so many creeps that my friends and I talked to because we were curious. No normal adult was giving us the information, but plenty of adults online were happy to talk and ask for favors in return. Shivers down my fucking spine.

I am so thankful that I was too nervous to do anything and usually ended conversations quickly. But the risk of genuine harm was right there, and our parents had no idea. We laughed whenever we saw a penis appear on chat roullete and clicked away, but we were not mature enough to know how fucked up it was. It was our parents’ job to guard us from that. Not by putting blinders on us. But by affording us the respect of an important conversation.

I am so passionate about people having this discussion with their kids. Kids are curious. The fact that the subject is taboo makes it even more exciting for kids. It is such a crucial moment in the transition to adulthood. Ignoring the conversation endangers them by making the subject seem exotic and inticing.

Have the conversation with your kids or someone else will. And you will have no control over how and when that happens.

Italy and mechanical engineering. I know that Italy has its own issues with young people leaving for better opportunities elsewhere. But every single place I have worked or vacationed in Italy has been more interesting and usually beautiful compared to where I am now.

Also, mechanical engineering just seems like there are lots of career paths to choose from. With some networking and determination, I think it could be a cool combination. Civil engineering or mine engineering would be cool in Italy too, can you imagine working at one of those marble quarries in Tuscany?

It has been several years since I watched the series, so I forget some of the ‘lore’. But as I remember the finale, there are 2 timelines or realities going on. The island good vs evil and the church reunions.

The church is a reunion of people who have lived and died on the island. The plane crash still happened, the events on the island still happened, it wasn’t some collective fever dream or purgatory that the passengers were living. The church just shows the characters after they died, but they are reunited with people they bonded with on the island. For example, Charlie is reunited with Claire. Those two people wouldn’t know one another if they did not survive the plane crash.

If someone has seen it more recently, maybe they could provide a better example? That’s the best I can describe it.

I think in hindsight, the ending is not that bad. Especially when you compare it to disasters like Game of Thrones and Pretty Little Liars. I haven’t seen the series in a few years, but I think watching it now on streaming is a completely different experience than tuning in every week.

I found it hard to follow the mysteries and plot week to week. To be fair, I was young, my attention span was short, and I didn’t participate in any discussions or forums which would have been helpful for understanding.

A lot of people didn’t understand the plot in the church was a sort of alternate reality where people were reunited in the afterlife. So people were upset that they were dead the whole time and that was too obvious. But that is not the plot, it’s just how people misremember it.

Love it or hate it, I think the ending wrapped up enough of the plot to be respectful to the audience that fell in love and watched all those seasons. I personally kind of appreciate that some things felt unanswered. It made the whole tv show seem more mystical without being tied up in a perfect bow. But I am not prone to poking too many holes in the fiction I consume. I find it relaxing to just suspend my disbelief and enjoy.

Foam mattress promising to be extra firm. It arrived in a convenient little roll, but 6 months later, it is absolute shit. Fell for the marketing and now my back is paying for it.

It made me irrationally mad that every significant character in the books was a seeker. Like Rowling’s shorthand for a worthy adversary or ally was just they play seeker. Harry, Draco, Cedric, Cho, Ginny, Krum, Charlie, Regulus. I know we get to know other members of the Gryfindor team, but aside from that everyone of note is so impressive because they were a seeker.

Abstract - break down of disasters and crimes with excellent narration and very interesting topics

Rare Earth - highlights uncommon locations (speaking as a Westerner) and the often horrific histories that framed their civilization/cities/people

Micerah Tewers - super talented maker that sews copies of red carpet looks and other fun custumes with some home decor. Not instructional at all, just fast paced and entertainingly wholesome

Ask a Mortician - really fascinating deep dives into what happened to the bodies of famous people, or people who died in extreme circumstances. She has recently highlighted a few infamous shipwrecks…which brings me to

Oceanliner designs and Part Time Explorer - both nautical history buffs that articulate the grandeur and sometimes horror of ship travel

Miniminuteman - archeology videos featuring a lot of lesser known sites that are fascinating. Articulate dismantling of psuedo-archeology bullshit and refreshingly modern understanding of science communication

LadyKnightthebrave - discussing the emotions that film and tv can make you feel. Honestly just cathartic if she talks about a movie you feel strongly about, like the articulate friend you wish you had to decompress with after an emotional movie

Contrapoints - incredible everything from set design to arguments. Long form, in depth explanations about a lot of topics some people would consider taboo, or that people are close minded about.

Atun Shei Films - known primarily for Check Mate Lincolnites which is a comedic sketch that dismantles lost cause myths from the civil war. Lots of interesting historical and film stuff.

Lindybeige - every video feels like an eccentric history professor’s impassioned tangent on a subject he deeply cares about, so it entirely derails the original subject of the lecture.

We have similar taste in youtubers! If you enjoy those disaster related videos, I recommend Abstract (formerly Real Horror). Great production value and storytelling. She does all her own work as far as I know, so she doesn’t have a huge playlist to watch sadly. But the narration and setup really add a gravitas to the disasters that I feel the other youtubers are missing.

https://m.youtube.com/@Abstract