I’ll never go off it again unless I get actually medicated.

Tell me you’re from the US without telling me you’re from the US.

They’re about to be very.

TIL

ICQ.

Wait, they’re gone‽

Uh-oh!!!

I miss that app.

Shut up, baby. I know it!

Never make yourself a priority to someone that treats you like an option.

Mine is “Make something idiot proof and they build a better idiot”

“I see,” said the blind man to his deaf wife as he picked up his hammer and saw.

Will it really mighty my penis man‽

Is good for boy to meet girl in park but better for boy to park meat in girl.

There you are!

Do know you?

No! But that’s where you are; you’re there!

-Austin Powers

The early bird gets the worm but the second mouse gets the cheese.

https://lemmy.blahaj.zone/post/38890041