Literally same. Luckily I had managed to avoid thinking of it beyond my teen years for a good decade. But it has come back worse than ever when I recently started listening to a podcast about some philosophy.

It’s fucking terrifying and depressing. Anyone who doesn’t believe in an afterlife but says it’s not terrifying and depressing is taking mega levels of copium.

At one point recently I remember I was walking around in public doing a bit of people watching and I was like holy fucking shit everyone is just walking around like this is nothing. Everyone is gonna die but we have all this random bullshit everyone is doing not realizing it’s gonna end. Idk.

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Lol true that it’s ridiculous but at least you can change this back to being the power button in the settings!!

I have to say, I felt the same until I got my first pair of wireless earbuds. Idk if I’m just clumsy, but I always managed to get headphone cables caught on things or I would like forget I was plugged into my computer or something and try to get up. I would get snagged on door handles and it would frequently rip the headphones off/out of my ears.

And oh my God when this stopped happening with wireless buds I was amazed at my freedom of movement and lack of being infuriated lmaooo. It felt so amazing.

I know that like for gaming, the slight delay in wireless buds isn’t really going to cut it for most, though.

There are other downsides too, obviously, but I finally understood what all of the fuss was about with wireless headphones/earbuds. I don’t miss wired anymore.

Lol!! Believe it or not, I hate cutting my food!

Because…

1. I’m lazy
2. When you’re used to using ultra sharp knives, things like steak knives feel so incredibly dull that it’s infuriating/“difficult”. At work, I go through scalpel blades like candy. A sharp blade is always key for my work!

I get every organ or piece of tissue that is removed from you during surgery. I cut up the tissue so it can be made into slides for the pathologist (a type of physician) to render a diagnosis.

Regularly use for work? Scalpel blades. My job would be essentially impossible without them.

Thank you!

Glad it’s working for you! I’m seeing two therapists concurrently right now (“cheating” on my old therapist with a side hustle lmao) until the end of the year because I’ve met my deductible. Then I’m gonna figure out who I want to drop.

I have appreciated my old therapist for getting me through a crisis, but I’ve just stagnated and don’t feel like I’m getting enough direction and guidance and specific things to help me. Her therapy style is more “big picture” and generalized if that makes sense, without giving me a lot of specific techniques to help me.

My work has threatened to fire me if I can’t get my shit together so I really want to make more progress.

The new one wants me to work through an extensive DBT workbook over time that gives very specific techniques to use. Then each session we kind of talk about my week and go over what I think worked and didn’t work in the book. Her input is not overly substantial, but I do like how the book can give me more direct techniques and potentially more progress idk.

So I’m considering dropping my old therapist but I feel some type of way about it.

Idk sorry you probably don’t care about me blabbering on lol.

Well…if you have anxiety, CBT is supposed to be the primary therapy modality for that lol.

What specific issue are you looking to address? If you figure that out, you can find out which therapy modalities are shown to work best for it.

How quickly it “starts to work” is entirely dependent on a) How honest you are, b) how open you are to outside perspectives, and c) how much baggage you’ve got to unpack.

More caveats to this…other things I’ve found…

1. If you don’t know what specific issue you need to work on, it may not even “work” at all. You’ll need to introspect and research and /or even seek others’ input if you don’t know already.
2. A lot of therapist I’ve come across, especially in online organizations, seem keen on using unstructured talk therapy. It can be great for basic validation, but not if you have more significant and complex issues. If you know your specific issue, it might help to research what kind of therapy modality works best for it. Then, look for therapists who use said modality and who have treated said condition.

I learned these things the hard way.

I have started and stopped therapy a zillion times before. People would always tell me “go to therapy”. It’s kind of insulting, honestly, as if it was some magic cure all way to dismiss me.

What I’ve found is that therapy doesn’t help if you don’t have a specific enough problem to work on!! So people would always tell me “go to therapy” and I couldn’t figure out wtf I was supposed to work on there so the therapists didn’t focus on anything helpful either.

BUT I feel like I’ve just finally discovered a specific thing I want to work on after years and years of this back and forth BS. So I researched a therapist that is said to use a specific therapy modality to treat my specific problem. We’ll see how it goes with her.

ALSO…it has been frustrating to me, but I’ve found that most therapists I’ve come across are just simply “talk therapists”. There is no real goal other than giving you validation and some general advice and vague concepts and techniques. This can be great for people…but for me it just hasn’t been helpful enough. It just doesn’t give me solid enough direction. But maybe a talk therapist is what you need…who knows?

I realize these don’t answer your questions directly, but I figured I’d share what I learned to hope if might help you. Best of luck.

Why should they have to be? Legitimately curious as to your answer, OP.

Do you get to see a lot more stars out at night there?

Seems kind of silly…but the downtown started this tradition years back in coating the entire facade of the buildings in Christmas lights…not in a gaudy, cheesy way, but one single color per building. One shop would be blue and the shop next door would be red, etc. It started to become “known” in the area that this town would have the most lights ever in the downtown. They basically made a festival every year about it and more and more visitors seemed to come from out of town. And as time went on, more and more business neighboring the downtown started taking part. It looks amazing at night…every single building entirely lit up in a different color. I haven’t seen it in years…I guess it’ll be almost 10 at this point.

Agreed, @sprigatito_bread@lemmy.world. Get a job. Any job. Ideally one that could pay a bit more than minimum wage and/or one tangentially related to the field you want to go into. But you can’t afford to be too picky. That’s step one.

Step two, move out. I know you said you don’t have friends. You don’t need them. But you need to find a roommate because you’re unlikely to be able to afford to live on your own.

https://www.reddit.com/r/roommates/comments/1fipamp/best_roommate_finding_apps/

This reddit link has some ideas/websites to try for step two. It’s not an exhaustive list on how to find a roommate, but it’s a start.

Check out the mental health community that MonsterTrick posted. It’s fairly active!

Wow. You are very lucky. My current job would be the best ever except my supervisor makes my life a living hell. :(

I have been here so long that it is hard to leave my friend.

Just by realizing this and making this comment honestly says a lot about you. A lot of good, that is. I’m rooting for you, OP, and I hope you eventually find a healthy relationship. :)

Idk…they were still doing this shit plenty pre-pandemic. Disney is notorious for it and it has bothered me to no end. I refuse to watch any of their continual releases of abominations of older great films.