This is just block device over network, it will not allow the use cases OP is asking for. You will still need a filesystem and a file-serving service on top of that.

What makes me really curious is, is it really the skin-tone that is the significant variable, or is it a very closely related confounding variable?

It seems so very weird to me that the tone of your skin can have such a significant impact.

How in the world would your life be a mess because of Twitter? And how would emacs solve that?