A far simpler version that my kids enjoy:

“What does the janitor say when he jumps out of the closet?”

So then a person could make his living by interviewing for jobs he’s not qualified for and could never get? I guess that probably wouldn’t happen.

I didn’t used to hate the long interview process until I applied for a job that had me fill out like a hundred questions for background information. It was like, “Have you ever been convicted of embezzlement for an amount greater than $500?” No. “Have you ever been convicted of embezzlement for an amount less than $500?” No… “Have you ever been convicted of embezzlement for exactly $500?”

Did you know that if they can guess your crime with enough specificity, legally you have to admit to it? At least that’s what I assume, based on the questionnaire. Like, “Have you ever been convicted of violating the endangered species act while crossing state lines in a class C vehicle on a Sunday?” And I’m like, “No, but you’re so close!”

Anyway, I got the offer, but then they rescinded it when I asked for more money.

“differently than you” is a funny way to say “triple clicking a hyperlink every fucking time oh my god you only have to click it once, mom”.

First Steps gave Galactus plenty of screen time. Definitely did him justice in my opinion.

I haven’t talked to a lot of people about AI, but I’m extremely skeptical, and my wife, who isn’t usually dialed into this sort of thing, fucking hates it. I’m not sure how that plays out across the general populace, but I’m inclined to think it’s pretty unpopular.

Fair enough. Those were bad examples. Explain this one, under “thinking”:

How do you stop thinking about someone?

To stop thinking about someone look for closure. Other methods may include finding someone else to think about, thinking of their negative traits, staying busy, and most importantly, respecting yourself. In the end, remember that it will all pass, and while there might not be a short term plan, patience and initiative will go a long way.

I’ve never met an architect before, so maybe you can give me a plausible reason they’d need to know about closure.

Here’s an entry from “looking”:

What does “Here’s looking at you, kid” mean?

The phrase “Here’s looking at you, kid” is fondly remembered from Rick’s famous line from the film Casablanca. The phrase means that he/she is happy the other person is there, and that the other person looks attractive.

Or how about this one under “comic books & video games”?

Are comic books better than movies?

Comic books are typically better than movies due to a variety of reasons that include cost and time, the personal vision of the author and artists, as well as their experimental and bold nature. Comics also deeply care about their viewers as well as create an engaging and active process.

I just can’t imagine how a designer would use this.

Why do architects and designers need a description of what carrying boxes is? Why do they need tips on senior mobility? It’s weird.

Was my link not clickable? It looks clickable on my browser.

I think they’re only 2D.

But they’d have written it in alienese. That’s why I say dolphins - without a formal writing system of their own, they’d naturally default to a human one for the purpose of studying humans.

dimensions.com

It’s the weirdest shit I’ve ever seen. Before I get into it, I want to point out that I’ve been using this site for years, since before LLMs were a thing, so this is definitely not generated by AI.

It’s just like, generic outline drawings of things. Objects, people, places, everything.

So sometimes I like to draw, and I need a model to work from for the pose and the proportions, and this site has a ton of them. Child kicking a ball? Yes. Adult man sitting on a bench? Several options to choose from. Woman carrying a box? Three different poses.

Pointing, pushing, protesting, thinking, vacuuming, raising one’s hand to summon a waiter in a restaurant, it’s all there.

I’m sure there’s some kind of industrial use for it, like for diagrams or blueprints or something, but then we get to the descriptions. Like on the page for people carrying boxes, it says:

People lift boxes either in their personal lives or at work. People lift boxes to move residences. Mailmen or delivery truck drivers lift boxes everyday as part of their job. Some jobs may require their applicants to be able to lift a certain weight of box. When lifting boxes, it is important to lift with your knees instead of your back to prevent back injury.

Then there’s always three questions, which they provide answers to. For carrying, those questions are:

What is a carry on bag?

What is carrying capacity?

How much can a horse carry?

Why? Whom is that for?

Under the pictures of elderly people it asks things like “What are the best exercises for maintaining mobility in seniors?” and “How can seniors adapt their homes for safety and accessibility?”

Is this for dolphins? Did a dolphin learn to read English, and they want to understand human society?

I’m struggling to find the weirdest examples, because honestly it’s the breadth as well as the depth. Someone clearly put a ton of work into this, and I love it, but I don’t understand it.

It’s so good. It’s actually even better without the Muppets talking, but obviously that’s part of the video’s charm.

https://youtu.be/oiMZa8flyYY

When they’re alone or with other people? If I’m alone, I’m facing forward.

Because the rest of us respect people who create things.

I find that a little witty.

Pro tip: you can save 1/3 words by just saying “I agree.”

Quiet people serve as a mirror to people who can’t shut up. That becomes uncomfortable for people who don’t like what they see.

On the other hand some people could stand to say a little less.

My job isn’t important, but I make good money and my work-life balance is excellent. I get to spend time with my wife, my kids, and my cats. So I’m good with it.

I’ve never been able to picture myself at an important job. I don’t know what that would be.