A long time ago, I was trying to figure out why I had so much trouble making friends. I talked to the few connections I had and did some online searches. Paraphrasing, I found an analysis similar to the following:
Friendship is like two people holding containers of water. In this metaphor, one person is holding a drinking glass, one is holding a bucket. If the person with the drinking glass offers ever bit of water they have, the person with the bucket feels it’s inadequate. If the person with the bucket offers all of their water, the other person feels overwhelmed.
When I read that, I was quite a bit younger and found it fairly profound. I shared it publicly in several places. Every person who saw it - including those I considered to be the metaphorical drinking glass people - declared themselves the bucket person. I did the same of myself so, whether I was right or wrong, I can’t blame any of those people.
In conclusion, I try to be a good person and I think I largely succeed, but experience has taught me that I shouldn’t trust people’s judgment of themselves. I’d like to think I’m an exception, but I’m no more exempt from this than anyone else I’ve observed, just - predictably - less able to see it in myself.
A long time ago, I was trying to figure out why I had so much trouble making friends. I talked to the few connections I had and did some online searches. Paraphrasing, I found an analysis similar to the following:
Friendship is like two people holding containers of water. In this metaphor, one person is holding a drinking glass, one is holding a bucket. If the person with the drinking glass offers ever bit of water they have, the person with the bucket feels it’s inadequate. If the person with the bucket offers all of their water, the other person feels overwhelmed.
When I read that, I was quite a bit younger and found it fairly profound. I shared it publicly in several places. Every person who saw it - including those I considered to be the metaphorical drinking glass people - declared themselves the bucket person. I did the same of myself so, whether I was right or wrong, I can’t blame any of those people.
In conclusion, I try to be a good person and I think I largely succeed, but experience has taught me that I shouldn’t trust people’s judgment of themselves. I’d like to think I’m an exception, but I’m no more exempt from this than anyone else I’ve observed, just - predictably - less able to see it in myself.