Figure out what you like and who you are and do it meticulously. I’m also extremely picky but also wildly pansexual and used to be extremely confused by that. Another thing that might help is to lean into any known kinks or find out more about yourself, to further compatibility. After that, you just gotta go on dates and start figuring out what you actually hate in other people.
For you, diet sounds like a big one. It is for me, too, but not in a vegetarian way. I’m like the opposite, where everybody I end up meeting has super restrictive diets, and I really like most kinds of food.
I dunno. Dating and finding good partners feels easier than finding friends, because at least there’s an industry around finding potential partners and it also feels weirdly more socially acceptable to put out your sexual/partner compatibility needs than your friend/social ones; having specific friends standards seems really taboo.
Everybody has fucked up self esteem right now: conservatives are in power.
As far as experience, there’s only one way to get that.
And for being a burden, just don’t be a burden. Your presence is not a burden. Wanting to find love or companionship is not a burden. You’re obviously surviving without them, now. That’s gotta show for something.
Just go on like two or three bad dates. Do your best, treat people like friends like how you’d want to be treated, take a shower and wear clean clothes. You’re gonna get rejected, you’re gonna run into people who you hurt or are hurt by you, you’re gonna get hurt. And that sucks, but it’s okay.
Be honest, if you want to find someone, you have to start doing that. Life is shockingly similar to RPGs and leveling up skills.
You have something to offer, so will somebody else. Relationships are about sharing. Find somebody worth sharing with who wants to share with you, too. Or somebodies… Life doesn’t have to be all about fulfilling or being fulfilled by a single partner, cheating is about breaking promises or assumed intent, love is not finite, only time. Look up “ethical non monogamy” (ENM) if that sounds viable to you. Requires a lot of emotional maturity, though, like high levels of emotional wisdom and self honesty.
I suggest just giving a few dates a real shot and seeing how annoying most other people actually are before you start putting everybody else on a pedestal. Even people who have their lives together can be the most unbearable people in the world.
I’m more so vegetarian. I still eat dairy and eggs. I can’t find anyone who would want to date anyway.
Figure out what you like and who you are and do it meticulously. I’m also extremely picky but also wildly pansexual and used to be extremely confused by that. Another thing that might help is to lean into any known kinks or find out more about yourself, to further compatibility. After that, you just gotta go on dates and start figuring out what you actually hate in other people.
For you, diet sounds like a big one. It is for me, too, but not in a vegetarian way. I’m like the opposite, where everybody I end up meeting has super restrictive diets, and I really like most kinds of food.
I dunno. Dating and finding good partners feels easier than finding friends, because at least there’s an industry around finding potential partners and it also feels weirdly more socially acceptable to put out your sexual/partner compatibility needs than your friend/social ones; having specific friends standards seems really taboo.
The problem is I feel like a burden. I also have low self-esteem and not a lot of life experience.
Everybody has fucked up self esteem right now: conservatives are in power.
As far as experience, there’s only one way to get that.
And for being a burden, just don’t be a burden. Your presence is not a burden. Wanting to find love or companionship is not a burden. You’re obviously surviving without them, now. That’s gotta show for something.
Just go on like two or three bad dates. Do your best, treat people like friends like how you’d want to be treated, take a shower and wear clean clothes. You’re gonna get rejected, you’re gonna run into people who you hurt or are hurt by you, you’re gonna get hurt. And that sucks, but it’s okay.
Be honest, if you want to find someone, you have to start doing that. Life is shockingly similar to RPGs and leveling up skills.
You have something to offer, so will somebody else. Relationships are about sharing. Find somebody worth sharing with who wants to share with you, too. Or somebodies… Life doesn’t have to be all about fulfilling or being fulfilled by a single partner, cheating is about breaking promises or assumed intent, love is not finite, only time. Look up “ethical non monogamy” (ENM) if that sounds viable to you. Requires a lot of emotional maturity, though, like high levels of emotional wisdom and self honesty.
I suggest just giving a few dates a real shot and seeing how annoying most other people actually are before you start putting everybody else on a pedestal. Even people who have their lives together can be the most unbearable people in the world.