Edit: This is a bonus check, he is not hurting for cash. He has a regular union pension plus social security.
My father is an expat living in the Philippines. My half-sister was dealing with his mail and financial stuff but has stopped/went no contact with him. I have no clue why, but I’m guessing they had a fight over something (I have zero contact with her). He is asking me to receive a paper union pension check and either take a picture and send it to him so he can sign it and use an app to deposit or forge his signature and deposit it. It’s bank fraud and for 600 I’m not willing to risk the consequences.
He says the union won’t direct deposit and it costs too much to send to him via mail or whatever. I asked why he didn’t set up a remailing service and he said something about trust and thieves as well as not wanting to pay.
He was not in my life 98% of the time and had ample opportunity to handle things before moving. He moved there to be with his new girlfriend while still married to another Phillipino. He said It was no big deal they do it all the time. She went with him then came back and sold everything she could and drained the accounts. I told him then I wouldn’t be dealing with stuff I have no legal standing in.
He tried guilt tripping me about the check and playing it off as no big deal and how desperate he is.
This is what I sent him:
I want to address this clearly so we can put it to rest.
When you chose to move overseas, I advised getting your affairs settled first, which included making sure that your banking and mail situation was handled properly. That was your decision to make.
We haven’t been in touch for months, and you chose not to reach out until an emergency landed on your lap. That was your choice as well.
When things fell apart with your previous living situation, you expected me to step in and deal with things. I told you then I was done dealing with this kind of chaos. I have no legal standing to handle your paperwork, and I will not do so. You have not formally provided legally binding documentation giving me explicit power of attorney, so I cannot and will not touch any financial or legal matters for you.
You have always spoken highly of the unions and their benefits. They have the capability to handle direct deposits or wire transfers the same as any other business. They are on your side, not mine. You and the union created this administrative issue, and you will need to work with them to resolve it.
My life experiences have taught me that family obligations do not override legal boundaries or personal safety. I will not commit check fraud, forge a signature, or take and transmit photos of negotiable financial instruments. Family, money, and legal issues do not mix, and I will not risk prison time or a federal banking violation over $600. There are people who get paid to deal with this type of thing.
This situation cannot be my responsibility to fix. I wish you the best in figuring it out directly with the trust or finding someone who can assist you.
You are not wrong, but to argue that you are risking prison is ludicrous.
You shouldn’t even try and justify why you are uncomfortable. It just invites an argument and risks making you look like you are making petty excuses, which it kind of does here.
Don’t over explain, just state your boundary and don’t engage past that.
I want to reiterate that I agree with your stance, but your statement needs to disallow argument, and the only way to do that is to not provide justification the way you do here.
He can resolve his own issue or, if you are willing, give you the proper legal authority to do what he is requesting.
Is he trying to avoid taxes or something?
No clue what the deal is, I’m likely only getting half the story.
And you are welcome to your opinion about the risk. I’m not willing to even entertain the chance. It would involve multiple states two countries and international law given the locations involved. What I do know is that it’s not worth 600 to me.