Nostalgia isn’t only a hell of a drug, but it’s a hell of an addiction too. Chasing times when you last felt good or when you felt things were right. Getting in touch with old flames that you forgot that there were reasons you moved on from, until you read the painful endings as to why those connections died.
Having those rose-tinted shades aren’t always good for you.
There are always additional choices available beyond the ones presented to you. They may not be optimal, but they are yours and they are there. And a principled choice with negative consequences can still be worth it. People get emotionally invested into all sorts of stupid shit, or never question why something is the way it is, or never express curiosity for alternatives. And you simply don’t need to accept these people’s framing for anything. It is even a parenting technique using the illusion of choice on children to force a decision that was never a choice to begin with.
I have an uncle that orders stuff not on the menu. Like ordering part of one meal and part of another (e.g. if the menu had “steak and fries” and “sausages and mashed potato” he might order steak with mashed potato).
95% of the time they can make what he’s asking for, and it blows people’s minds as they don’t even realise they can do that.
Then you pay for fries and mashed potatoes but get only second
If it’s something like my example, then they will generally just charge for the main meal as swapping fries for mashed potato is pretty cost neutral. If you start adding bacon that’s a different story.
God I find it difficult enough to decide what to have just ordering of the menu without chopping and changing
I raised my children to be unafraid to question or challenge authority. And I fucking regret it. I hope they’re happy I did in ten years but it sucks right now.