LQX Lemmy
  • Communities
  • Create Post
  • Create Community
  • heart
    Support Lemmy
  • search
    Search
  • Login
  • Sign Up
Sjmarf@sh.itjust.works to Programmer Humor@programming.dev · 1 年前

Trolley problem

sh.itjust.works

message-square
88
link
fedilink
584

Trolley problem

sh.itjust.works

Sjmarf@sh.itjust.works to Programmer Humor@programming.dev · 1 年前
message-square
88
link
fedilink
alert-triangle
You must log in or # to comment.
  • kryptonianCodeMonkey@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    230
    arrow-down
    1
    ·
    1 年前

    Option 3 means that the Javascript standards team dies either way, right? Number 3. No hesitation.

    • Skullgrid@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      68
      arrow-down
      1
      ·
      1 年前

      the c++ team is a sacrifice I’m willing to make. can we just shoot Brendan Eich in the head if he’s not in there too?

      • kryptonianCodeMonkey@lemmy.world
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        40
        ·
        1 年前

        Push him onto the pressure pad. Make it his fault.

      • RoyaltyInTraining@lemmy.world
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        14
        arrow-down
        2
        ·
        1 年前

        I feel like all C++ does these days is badly and very slowly copy other languages. It wouldn’t be a huge loss.

      • Ricky Rigatoni@lemm.ee
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        2
        arrow-down
        24
        ·
        1 年前

        C++ is obsolete now that we have Go

        • KSP Atlas@sopuli.xyz
          link
          fedilink
          arrow-up
          15
          ·
          1 年前

          C++ is better suited to lower level operations than Go, C++ can have huge control over the environment (allowing it to be run on bare metal with no OS) while Go is limited due to it using a garbage collector

          If there was a replacement for C++, the best bet IMO would be Zig

          • stetech@lemmy.world
            link
            fedilink
            arrow-up
            2
            ·
            1 年前

            As someone who knows neither of the three: Why Zig over Rust as a Cpp replacement?

            • dejected_warp_core@lemmy.world
              link
              fedilink
              arrow-up
              5
              ·
              1 年前

              As someone who just picked through the Zig docs (take this with a mountain of salt), Zig has a few things going for it:

              • spec is simple and closer to C in scope
              • modern language design, toolchain, and overall ergonomics
              • Go-like struct & interface system
              • 1st-class C interoperability

              Go foists co-routines on you and the runtime, and Rust has the borrow checker. Both of these things deeply impact language design, standard libraries, and the overall developer experience. So Zig might actually be a “more modern C” in many ways which makes it a contender. That said, it’s not a 1:1 comparsion since it lacks everything else that C++ does: you’d have to re-envision your software designs as something other than OOP if that’s what you’re used to.

            • ZILtoid1991@lemmy.world
              link
              fedilink
              arrow-up
              3
              ·
              1 年前

              Rust has its own issues.

              Before the memory safety craze, Rust was hyped as a functional programming language, meaning it not only has lambdas and monads, but also const by default, which will force you to rethink all your programming decisions. Also no classes, so you do even more rethinking.

              • optional@sh.itjust.works
                link
                fedilink
                arrow-up
                2
                ·
                1 年前

                I don’t just rethink my programming decision but all my life decisions every night. Seem like Rust is the perfect language for me.

        • lime!@feddit.nu
          link
          fedilink
          English
          arrow-up
          13
          ·
          1 年前

          wat

          • Ricky Rigatoni@lemm.ee
            link
            fedilink
            arrow-up
            4
            arrow-down
            1
            ·
            1 年前

            I am currently in the process of completely rewriting the BSD kernel in go.

            • lime!@feddit.nu
              link
              fedilink
              English
              arrow-up
              7
              ·
              1 年前

              how are you handling the GC? how are you handling things like interrupts?

              • Ricky Rigatoni@lemm.ee
                link
                fedilink
                arrow-up
                10
                ·
                1 年前

                GOd will handle it 🙏

                • lime!@feddit.nu
                  link
                  fedilink
                  English
                  arrow-up
                  1
                  arrow-down
                  1
                  ·
                  1 年前

                  oh so you haven’t actually done any of it.

          • ZILtoid1991@lemmy.world
            link
            fedilink
            arrow-up
            1
            ·
            1 年前

            I prefer the binary format over the text format of WASM.

    • 🇰 🌀 🇱 🇦 🇳 🇦 🇰 🇮 🏆@yiffit.net
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      2
      arrow-down
      1
      ·
      1 年前

      wait nvm I fucked up

  • kryptonianCodeMonkey@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    82
    arrow-down
    1
    ·
    1 年前

    Javascript Standards Team is such an Oxymoron.

    • rimjob_rainer@discuss.tchncs.de
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      7
      arrow-down
      3
      ·
      1 年前

      Yeah, didn’t know there was a standard committee and can’t believe how inept they are.

    • kattfisk@lemmy.dbzer0.com
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      3
      arrow-down
      1
      ·
      1 年前

      They’ve done amazing work trying to turn the clusterfuck they started with into a good language

      • scutiger@lemmy.world
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        6
        ·
        1 年前

        That “trying” is doing the heavy lifting in that sentence.

        • kattfisk@lemmy.dbzer0.com
          link
          fedilink
          arrow-up
          1
          ·
          1 年前

          What are some of the outstanding issues that haven’t been addressed? I feel like there are genuinely good ways of doing everything these days

          • far_university190@feddit.org
            link
            fedilink
            English
            arrow-up
            4
            arrow-down
            1
            ·
            1 年前

            Javascript

  • rimjob_rainer@discuss.tchncs.de
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    62
    ·
    1 年前

    Bottom tracks, easy

    • TheGiantKorean@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      19
      ·
      edit-2
      8 个月前

      deleted by creator

    • ghost_of_faso3@lemmygrad.ml
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      1
      ·
      1 年前

      deleted by creator

  • bleistift2@sopuli.xyz
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    49
    arrow-down
    1
    ·
    1 年前

    “You and your entire family” means “All life on Earth”.

    That should make the decision somewhat easier.

    • Zozano@aussie.zone
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      12
      arrow-down
      1
      ·
      1 年前

      By my definition, family is who you treat like family.

      • Donkter@lemmy.world
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        7
        arrow-down
        1
        ·
        1 年前

        I try to treat everyone I meet like family

    • trxxruraxvr@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      12
      arrow-down
      1
      ·
      1 年前

      If you make it “all human live” it starts to look quite attractive again

    • metaStatic@kbin.earth
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      4
      ·
      1 年前

      I thought seaweed didn’t have a common ancestor

  • Eager Eagle@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    30
    arrow-down
    1
    ·
    1 年前

    there might be an argument that JavaScript kills more than a nuclear bomb

  • peoplebeproblems@midwest.social
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    29
    arrow-down
    1
    ·
    1 年前

    Ok so this one just isn’t fair.

    Two possibilities end up with me dead, two end up with millions dead, and one ends up with me being unemployed.

    Sorry not sorry Team A and B, sacrifices must be made.

    • BatmanAoD@programming.dev
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      4
      ·
      1 年前

      Wait, which one leaves you unemployed?

      • peoplebeproblems@midwest.social
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        10
        ·
        1 年前

        The lack of standards path of course.

        • BatmanAoD@programming.dev
          link
          fedilink
          arrow-up
          2
          arrow-down
          1
          ·
          1 年前

          Unless you work for the committee or for ISO somehow, then I don’t think that really follows. C++ and JavaScript were both used in production for decades before they had standards, and the dissolution of the standards committee wouldn’t cause compiler vendors to stop developing compilers.

          • peoplebeproblems@midwest.social
            link
            fedilink
            English
            arrow-up
            2
            ·
            1 年前

            Ok.

            Fair.

  • finley@lemm.ee
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    28
    ·
    edit-2
    1 年前

    Removed by mod

  • zib@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    25
    ·
    1 年前

    I’d take my odds with the bottom track.

    • Chakravanti@monero.town
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      3
      ·
      1 年前

      I agree. And if it doesn’t fire the missile, I’ll go get that and hook it up to my Motorcycle like Raven (Snow Crash)!

      • threshold_dweller@lemmy.today
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        1
        arrow-down
        1
        ·
        1 年前

        poor impulse control

        • Chakravanti@monero.town
          link
          fedilink
          English
          arrow-up
          1
          ·
          1 年前

          Oh, don’t misunderstand. I had that thought first time I read Snow Crash about a decade ago now. Haven’t found thought changing mind since. Just because Raven was poor doesn’t mean he made a “bad” decision in certain senses!

          • threshold_dweller@lemmy.today
            link
            fedilink
            arrow-up
            1
            arrow-down
            1
            ·
            1 年前

            He literally has it tattooed on his forehead.

            • Chakravanti@monero.town
              link
              fedilink
              English
              arrow-up
              1
              ·
              1 年前

              Been about a damn decade and I know I need to read it again.

  • passiveaggressivesonar@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    20
    ·
    1 年前

    Which metropolitan area?

    • superkret@feddit.org
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      17
      ·
      1 年前

      Assuming it is in the US, at 4.5 million it can only be San Francisco/Oakland/Berkeley.

      • underisk@lemmy.ml
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        33
        ·
        1 年前

        would the bomb also kill javascript and C++ or would I have to keep throwing trolleys at it until I get both silicon valley and the JS/C++ devs?

        • jol@discuss.tchncs.de
          link
          fedilink
          arrow-up
          19
          ·
          1 年前

          At that distance it also kills you, so it sounds like a good deal. No regrets.

          • underisk@lemmy.ml
            link
            fedilink
            arrow-up
            7
            ·
            1 年前

            win win win

      • Drewfro66@lemmygrad.ml
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        4
        ·
        1 年前

        Oh okay, so option 3 is a win/win

  • I Cast Fist@programming.dev
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    20
    ·
    1 年前

    I’ve played enough X-COM to know that 50/50 is actually 100%, I just don’t know which way. Better trigger it!!

    • darkbaron202@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      9
      ·
      1 年前

      30%? Let me deliver that shot with crit across the map to your teammate hunkered down behind full cover for you!

  • Rivalarrival@lemmy.today
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    19
    ·
    1 年前

    A Mark VI only has a 18 to 160 kiloton yield.

    Can we replace it with a B83?

  • samus12345@lemm.ee
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    19
    ·
    1 年前

    Well, you can take yourself out of the equation because you’re not tied down and can just move after flipping the switch.

    chooses bottom track

    “C’mon…c’mon!”

    trolley heads towards committe members

    “Dammit!”

    runs over and jumps on the nuclear bomb pressure pad

  • Dizzy Devil Ducky@lemm.ee
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    14
    ·
    1 年前

    I’ll take the 50/50 because those are some damn good odds!

    • houstoneulers@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      3
      ·
      1 年前

      those are the best odds i’ve had in years

      -dr. mann

  • AbsoluteChicagoDog@lemm.ee
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    12
    ·
    1 年前

    deleted by creator

  • Whorehoarder@lemmynsfw.com
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    8
    ·
    1 年前

    Are we in the blast zone of the nuke?

    • xmunk@sh.itjust.works
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      13
      ·
      1 年前

      Maybe we could use Javascript to direct a simple robot to set the lever while we remain at a safe distance?

      Maybe the real solution to this diagram is to nuke it from orbit.

      • seang96@spgrn.com
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        7
        ·
        1 年前

        But the robot has to run windows vista

        • xmunk@sh.itjust.works
          link
          fedilink
          arrow-up
          6
          ·
          1 年前

          And have a valid Apple developer account?

Programmer Humor@programming.dev

programmer_humor@programming.dev

Subscribe from Remote Instance

Create a post
You are not logged in. However you can subscribe from another Fediverse account, for example Lemmy or Mastodon. To do this, paste the following into the search field of your instance: !programmer_humor@programming.dev

Welcome to Programmer Humor!

This is a place where you can post jokes, memes, humor, etc. related to programming!

For sharing awful code theres also Programming Horror.

Rules

  • Keep content in english
  • No advertisements
  • Posts must be related to programming or programmer topics
Visibility: Public
globe

This community can be federated to other instances and be posted/commented in by their users.

  • 1.43K users / day
  • 2.43K users / week
  • 8.35K users / month
  • 17.7K users / 6 months
  • 1 local subscriber
  • 31.9K subscribers
  • 1.89K Posts
  • 56.7K Comments
  • Modlog
  • mods:
  • adr1an@programming.dev
  • Feyter@programming.dev
  • BurningTurtle@programming.dev
  • Pierre-Yves Lapersonne@programming.dev
  • BE: 0.19.16
  • Modlog
  • Legal
  • Instances
  • Docs
  • Code
  • join-lemmy.org